Yesterday was my harvest and this is what I wore!
Not as cool as the overalls but still foxy.
The whole process was pretty amazing. I got to the clinic a little after 9 AM. The always friendly fertility clinic staff got me all suited up in the finest hospital garb and gave me all sorts of magazines to read. I had a chat with the anesthesiologist about any allergies. He took my blood pressure, height, weight, etc., all the usual stuff.
Then I got into the crazy surgery bed with gyno stirrups that they strap your legs too! I was officially creeped out. And FREEZING! Nurses to the rescue! I was immediately swathed in warm blankets and given a foot rub. Not bad. I glanced at the clock and saw it was 10:15 AM. This was it. All strapped in. No turning back. I'm going to produce at least 15 eggs dammit.
Then I was given the little oxygen tubes in the nostrils and my anesthesiologist told me he was going to get my drip started just a teensy bit so I could start relaxing. I blinked and woke up in the recovery room! No, I'm serious. It was 10:55. The first thing out of my mouth was "HOW MANY EGGS?!?!?!?!" A nurse laughed at me and said "26" (!!!!!!!!!) as she was walking away I started cackling to myself like a crazy person and mumbling loudly "OH THAT'S WONDERFUL!" What? I'm sure people do weirder shit than that after being put under. I've seed David after the Dentist.
I glanced around and another nurse asked if I wanted any water, juice, or crackers since I had been forbidden from eating or drinking since the previous night. My response "Yes! All of them!" After that I was allowed to get dressed in real people clothes (well not really, I was told to wear sweatpants and was NOT PLEASED about it) and use the bathroom and read more magazines while the drugs wore off.
I felt pretty great. No pain. No blood. Some nasty cramps but nothing worse than what I would get in high school. I was feeling so good that when Gay Husband dutifully came to pick me up I wanted to walk across town to get (finally!) Everything bagels. I imagined being a bundle of pain and grogginess that was rolled into a cab but everything was so much better! Hurray!
The shitty cramps continued into this morning but not so bad that I couldn't go to class. By late afternoon they were mostly gone. I was planning on doing the sex tonight but I feel a yeast infection coming on (knew it), boyfriend hurt his back, and I'm feeling super moody. I don't know if the moodiness is my hormone levels trying to readjust themselves after all the injections, or a result of my mother telling me hair looks bad, or a combination of both. All I know is that I want to stay inside or magically be transported to boyfriend's apartment sans having to deal with public transportation. I also want to start collecting unique and beautiful hats to cover up my stupid head during the unfortunate growing out a haircut phase.
But I still want to have the sex : (

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